Sample Technical Resume for an Information Technology Specialist
- Critique
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About this Sample Resume Critique
In this sample resume critique, the certified professional resume writer at
ResumeEdge explains
the process of creating the client's "after" resume from the client's "before" resume.
So that you may easily compare them to judge the quality of
ResumeEdge's work,
both the "before" and "after"
sample resumes are linked below. They are also linked from the Sample
Resumes page.
Sample Resume Critique
Dear Woo,
In keeping with your stated purpose to use this resume for your
business school applications, I chose a modern, dynamic format
that is attractive and easy to read, and is innovative in design,
much like the IT field.
In your original resume, your name doesn't truly stand out from
the rest of the text. To accomplish this, I used a "designer" font
and placed your name to the left, separating it from your contact
information. Instantly, a reader knows this is Woo Ho's resume.
Because the eye is drawn to the upper right hand part of a page,
I placed your phone numbers, email address, and residence there.
Again, this separation makes the data stand out - a necessity when
your resume is competing with hundreds of others.
While your resume began with your educational and military data,
I decided to start with a summary of your qualifications. This
easy-to-read paragraph highlights your obvious leadership skills
and the success you've enjoyed in the airline, retail, and insurance
industries - i.e. reducing IT maintenance costs, building teams,
and devising successful strategies. Also prominently displayed
are your ICSE and MCSE designations.
Given your solid experience at RTC, I next presented your professional
experience. In your original resume there's no visual distinction
between your job duties and accomplishments. Because a resume is
read so quickly, it's essential to make your accomplishments stand
out. To do this, I separated them from the rest of the bulleted
text beneath their own heading. The eye is immediately drawn to
this area, as it should be.
In presenting the data, I reworded your bullet points. One prominent
example would be changing --
"Established Korean Air network outsourcing contract (280 million
USD for 10 years) as an Engagement Manager by leading RTC outsourcing
team with industry specialty and IT architecture."
To -
"Spearheaded a 10-year, $280 million Korean Air Network outsourcing
contract by leading the RTC outsourcing team with industry specialty
and IT architecture."
Spearheading is far more powerful than established. The sentence
was also condensed and reworded so that it would read more easily.
Another example would be changing --
"Consulted cargo business and IT strategy for Korean Airlines
as an Industry Consultant. Consulted IT master plan for Korean
Airlines and Asiana Airlines."
To -
"Engineered IT strategy and cargo business for Korean Airlines;
developed an IT master plan for Korean Airlines and Asiana Airlines
during tenure as an Industry Consultant."
Again, engineered is far more powerful than consulted. Two bullet
points were condensed to one with no loss of data. And the flow
of the text is much smoother.
To avoid use of the word "serve" in relation to your tenure as
a labor representative, I chose the word selected -
"Selected to be the Labor Representative on the RTC Labor Management
Committee."
This information gives one an idea of your leadership skills and
potential. Indeed, you did serve. But first you had to be selected.
A small, but powerful difference.
I ended with your education, including the scholarship you received
and your presidency at the Korea University Academic Society. The
scholarship shows your determination and success at academics,
while the office you held clearly displays the leadership potential
you had during those college years.
Due to space considerations and your stated goal in keeping this
resume to one page, I did not include your military experience.
Given your impressive history with RTC, the military data added
little to your overall accomplishments.
Each decision to highlight and condense data was in keeping with
industry guidelines and standards set forth by the Professional
Association of Resume Writers (PARW).
With your superior skills and this resume, I feel you have an
excellent chance at reaching your stated goals.
The best of luck,
CyberEdit Editor
Certified Professional Resume Writer (CPRW)
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